LESSON 2

MONSTER?

This programme is dedicated to the kids! All the kids in this world, even the already “big ones” and also the ones that still want to become it. But it should be dedicated as well to the kids within ourselves, to our all our own kids and especially of course to Hannah and Michael.

Everybody who was supposed to deliver performance at a certain time – and this is affecting all of us – knows, that one is opposed to a very intense performance pressure due to a strict lapse of time and the unrepeatability of a situation.

You do know this situation for sure: You have been practicing enough, studied or trained and are therefore well prepared – and then the nerves are somehow not cooperating. In the classroom, the conference room, in front of the camera, at the presentation, during negotiations… - and all of a sudden we are busy with completely different things than initially planned. Where is our acquired behavior at? What happened to the learnt contents? Do really our nerves only decide about whether we are good or not? Whether we love what we do and we do what we love?

We asked many, many people that are under continual pressure due to their activities to describe how stage fright occurs in their personal situation.

These people were for example: practicing artists and musicians, actors, athletes,…
Mainly they told us the following points:
- The feeling to stay behind the own possibilities
- Problems to concentrate and focus
- Monster?
- Physical blockades (e.g. tremor, intensive sweating, to feel as if paralyzed,…
- Lack of motivation, no precise goals
- Existential fear
- The feeling of being unlucky all the time
- Temporary or chronical lethargy
- “Being unable to feel oneself”
- Lack of self-confidence
- Dependence on sedatives
- Not being able to find the necessary mental or physical tranquility
- The feeling of not being able to be creative
- Loss of performance due to distracting nervousness
- The feeling of being misunderstood
- Powerlessness
- Frustration
- Not being able to let oneself go in front of audience
- Fear of failing

If we obviously are not capable of doing what we actually want at some points, why do we then not get rid of that pointless behavior, as soon as we realize it? Or are we dealing with an overly powerful, mysterious monster that is resting on us like a bad curse and just waiting for the moment to wear you down.?

The answer is (and you will not like it a lot): yes and no! Yes, there is a force in every one of us, that is responsible for all these unpleasant effects. Yes, this force is stronger than all our thinking, than our desire and our rules. By talking about this force we do not mean God, Allah, Buddha, Krishna or Manitu, but “THE GOOD OLD BERTA”. And no, she doesn’t want to wear us down, on the contrary! Who this Berta is, what Berta wants, what Berta is like and why Berta can sometimes be so ugly is something we will be dealing with in our next letter of training.