LESSON 8

NEGOTIATION
WITH BERTA

This is where we are at: 

You've already identified a situation (or do it now) that you want to do (examples: an exercise, a test, a concert, an audition, a hearing, a speech), but also it should produce an annoying and uncomfortable feeling once you think of it. In other words, seek for a specific challenge where your Berta has already associated a blocking pain with it.

Out of this, formulate your judgment of Berta, so to speak the generalization (s) of your nervous system. If there are more, please write them all down properly and make the following procedure with each of these ‘problem rules’ (generalizations) individually, so it won’t be a problem.

For example:  ‘Before an exam / a performance all my power has gone and I feel really down.’ or ‘When I see the Lord Drbala, I cannot concentrate anymore and am totally nervous.’ or  ‘I'm simply not a good speaker.’ or ‘I’m always the loser in a negotiation.’

And now we exchange these inhibiting rules against good ones. It is easier than one might suspect: First of all, pick one of the ‘problem rules’. Close your eyes and go back into your past for around 5 years. Search for specific situations in which you have been obstructed trough this problem rule. You have to see the people and hear them speak in your thoughts. Your feeling should be the same as at that point. What exactly have you looked at in this moment? How exactly did you feel and how small have you felt when you, for example, did not insist on your right? Imagine this pain of this former situation in more details. Imagine looking at yourself in a mirror. What kind of face are you looking at and how are you looking at all? You have to combine the greatest pain you can think of, with the memory of this situation. Think of how you have suffered and how other people have laughed at you. Do this exercise now with all your commitment. Only then it will lead to a success. Feel your pain right now.

Next, think all over this situation again. Right there where you are, here and now. What disturbs the situation right now? What did you miss so far because of what happened in this situation? What causes you to feel all the pain? What do you feel at all regarding this situation? Take all your time needed and search for the emotion.

Now we are moving on to the future. Observe yourself in the future. Imagine you are 5 years older and this situation is still valid. Which plans did you have to dismiss now because of this situation? How many exams did you have to repeat? Think of yourself looking in a mirror. Do you look much older?  Do you even seem younger? Do you look happy or more dogged? How do you feel? What type of pain (our sense) do feel because of your restriction? Do this exercise now!

And now go even deeper into your future. How did the pain increase? In ten years, or even twenty years? Try to see and feel yourself in around 10 years! But right now. What course did the events take, because this situation is still reality?

Get up now, shake your whole body and change your emotional condition from insight. Move forward to a confident and positive emotion of joy. How do you feel when you succeeded the situation with no big effort? Imagine a person’s emotion, who would have no problems at all with this kind of situation. How does this person look like? How does he/she move? What is he/she thinking? How does he/she feel before, during and afterwards? Imagine you are Superman or Superwoman! You are superior, great and wonderful! Where do you feel the force in your body? Where and how do you feel the joy? How does it feel to be successful in this kind of situation? Borrow this feeling from someone (someone different or your future personality) NOW and feel and enjoy this power in you!!! Ask yourself the following questions: ‘What can I make better there?’ ‘What can I learn now form myself?’ “What is the biggest challenge for me?’ ‘Which rule is simply the best?’

You will see in the end that when you search for the right you will find the right answers. If you feel valuable you can reach force, flexibility and assertiveness. Self-doubt is a big challenge! You can prove that it is possible to be successful for example with not much time, or not much money, or even as a young employee, when the idea, the feeling connection and the direction are right.

Change your attitude now! Examine how you feel better immediately and how the new inner joy gives you force and new energy! Enjoy this new feeling with your whole body and soul. Right now! Feel happy, because your Berta is proud of you! Remember that for her there is no difference if the situation is ‘only’ real for you or if is an interpretation of someone external!

Now move on to your future with this new and better rule. Take this infinite joy and feel what you can perceive through it. How much does it makes you feel better? Imagine yourself again in the mirror. How do you look like? What do you wear? What is your pasture? How do you move? How does your flat look like? Who are the people you are surrounded? Ask yourself all these questions right now!

If you train these exercises conscientiously, you will have great success! You only get a lot of force if you really train it and you know how to use it. You are successful when you believe on these rules, just as you did before with the restrictions. Faith can move mountains! Everything you think is right, will be right or is already right. All used rules until now are insignificant. The past has no power on your future. The past cannot change the future. You are in the present right now and you have to do something for your Berta now. You can invest, train and force her right now. How do feel and how do change if you can enjoy happily?

You have shown your Berta now how you can support her really! You have coupled pain to things you don’t like and linked joy to all the things you really like. Now we can move on to fight all the monsters for your Berta, who always get you down! The following part will explain exactly this fight.